Mommy Lesson 821: Mom-cation

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Whether you’re a stay at home mom or a working mom there will come a moment where you may find yourself feeling slightly overwhelmed. There may be a mild sense of “mommy needs a break” beginning to creep in and you know that it is possible for it to turn into a full on Mommy Hulk attack. It could be related to the ever growing pile of laundry, the dishes that are evidently reproducing in the kitchen sink, or the childless neighbors that feel sleep is overrated and must impose their views on everyone within a ten mile radius.

You may walk through the house, with your name being called over and over;
Mommy watch this, look over here, turn this way, mommy see what I can do, mommy what’s for lunch, for dinner, for snack, what’s to eat for the next year? Mommy did you know if I shake my head from side to side like this really fast the whole room spins?

If you squint just right you imagine that this is how celebrities must feel when the paparazzi is around, eagerly calling their name, clamoring to get their photo. That is if they were wearing clothes that may or may not have baby excretions on it and if the photographers resemble Oompa Loompas. The visions of glamor and paparazzi subside as you expertly duck and dodge flying objects, which are aimed with surprising accuracy at your head. You unclench little fists that seem to be multiplying and attaching themselves with a vice like quality. If you have ever been attacked by an angry octopus, you can relate.

You may be struggling to detach the child who has apparently superglued themselves to your leg, when you realize that the original mild feeling of “mommy needs a break” has turned into a “mommy needs a break right freaking NOW” feeling. This feeling is slightly more intense than the previous feeling, coupled with a desire to laugh out loud like a hysterical loon.

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First of all, take a deep breath, it totally okay to not love every single minute of being mommy. Keeping people alive is hard work, and you do a great job at it! Stay at home moms and working moms, hear me when I say: It’s totally okay to give yourself a break, and NOT feel guilty.

Second, we can’t all be amazing Pinterest mamas every single minute of every day. I have heard many times, “I just don’t know how you have time to do all those activities with your kids”. Let me tell you my secret, I don’t, I make time by not showering, doing laundry or washing dishes! (Not every day mind you, but we all have to make SOME sacrifices…)

Finally, I would like to share with you a little known secret call the Mom-cation. This is in no way like a vacation, it only sounds like it. It is however, a nice way to secure a quick break for yourself and ensure that everyone is alive when you return feeling refreshed and revitalized. Your Mom-cation can take place anywhere you would like it to and can be customized to fit your specific needs at that specific moment. I would love to share with you five of my favorite Mom-cation destinations:

The Mail Box:

You can take a nice little walk out to your mailbox or even your neighbors mailbox. It doesn’t matter if you’ve checked the mail sixteen times already and you know the postman has already been by, just take saunter on out there anyway. A little hope never hurt anyone! While you’re out there you could pull up a curb seat and get some fresh air. This Mom-cation will be over when you choose to return to the house or your children escape, typically naked, and run around the yard screaming.

The Bathroom:

It’s only gross if you haven’t cleaned it. This one may take a little more planning, if you only have one bathroom, you will need to ensure that all the little people have been adequately pottied. When you have insured that all bladders and bowels are emptied, grab your favorite snack, and casually say “I’m going to the bathroom”. This is actually quite pleasant if you have invested in a deliciously comfy rug! Kick back, enjoy your snack, and peruse Pinterest. You will know that this Mom-cation is over when your children gather outside the door like zombies and begin poking their fingers under the door.

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The Store:

Like the previous Mom-cation, this one may require a bit more preparation. The next time you are at the store, pick up extras of the families most used non-perishable item. You can place them in a secured location in your vehicle or at a trusted friends house. This is best enacted when there is a trusted individual in the household to maintain live-ability of the children. This Mom-cation begins when you sadly look through the cabinet and announce that you have to go to the store, during the busiest time of the day. Leave the house, head to the nearest wifi hotspot and catch up on your latest show. You should probably limit this to a single episode before returning triumphantly with your pre-purchased loot.

The Errands

This one begins when your children have been left in the arms of a trusted care giver and you leave the house in your car. This Mom-cation can prove quite productive if you truly choose to tick items off of your list. The choices are limitless while you “Run Errands”. Go to your favorite restaurant and select a table for you and your best book, meet up with another mom on mom-cation or you can bring along a pillow and blanket and pull over for a nap! I personally love naps and am quite a talented sleeper.

The Dog Walk:

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This is a bonus mom-cation for those of us brave enough to take on a family member of the four legged variety. While you are capable of walking a cat, lizard or gerbil, this best performed with a canine. The logistics are quite simple, with the children adequately supervised, you place your pet on their leash and proceed to walk them. If you have a snobby and moderately lazy dog like mine, you may want to avoid eye contact as you drag their stubborn butts down the sidewalk. This mom-cation gives you an opportunity to bond with your pet, I’ve heard gerbils are quite social, and soak up some Vitamin D. If you have a friend in the neighborhood, there is the option of stopping by there. If given enough notice I’m sure they will provide you with fresh baked cookies.

I want you to know that I adore my children, and I’m certain that you do to! However, I also need you to know that it’s okay to take a break every now and then. It’s important and even healthy to find time for YOU and not beat yourself up about it. Moms cannot continue taking care of everyone else, if they don’t take time to care for themselves too! It is beneficial for our children to see us taking care of ourselves. Understand, please, that I am not encouraging you to abandon your children or responsibilities. I am suggesting that you take some “me” time to decompress and appreciate yourself every so often, because you’re pretty amazing and you deserve it! Whether you choose to take one of my suggested Mom-cations or make up your own, give yourself a little break, and enjoy it!

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